f it weren't for the fact that I never stopped in the
first place, it'd be enough to get me collecting
again. That's how great Bandai's new Soul of Chogokin
"Afrodai A" is.
There's also no question that this is one really weird
toy. The beige-and-orange color scheme looks like my
parents' "rumpus room" from 1976. And speaking of
mommy and daddy, the breast-firing gimmick has got to
be one of the most Oedipal weapons ever incorporated
into a robot design. Somehow, though, it all pulls
together. Female forms are so rare in the pantheon of
Japanese giant robot designs that Aphrodite (as
"Afurodai" translates into English) is a stand-out the
second she comes out of her styrofoam (oh, glorious
A well-done quartet of diecast renditions of the
various 'Ladies of Mazinger' hit shelves well over a
year ago thanks to our license-evading friends in Hong
Kong. But as you might expect, Bandai's take on the
subject is in another league altogether. Let's take a
look at what makes this lovely lady tick.
-Only the head, hands, and (I cannot believe I'm
saying this) boobies are plastic. Incredible diecast
content for a ¥3,500 toy.
- Yeah, I saw you reading that again. ¥3,500. Talk
about a cheap date.
- Speaking of which, it's about damn time someone
actually engineered an Aphrodite toy with firing
boobies. (Uh, not that I was WAITING for it or
- Unlike her Hong Kong soul-sisters, this Aphrodite
can actually stand unassisted.
- She's a limber little minx. (Did I actually just say
- Beautiful enameled paint job.
-An actual glassed-in (well, plasticed-in) cockpit!
- Speaking of cheap dates, those ball-joints are
almost certain to get loose after, um, extended play.
(Whatever hideous form that may take.)
- Good lord, that's the only bad point I can think of!
Chalk up a big negative for not giving this jaded
collector more to complain about.
- The ability to swap Aphrodite's C-cup missiles for a
pair of quadruple-Ds -- complete with nipples -- is
enough to enthrall and enflame lonesome, single
collectors even more than usual. DOWN, boys.
- The thought of the obscene fetish-porn websites this
toy series is certain to spawn is enough to make me
stop frequenting those used-panty vending machines in
And there you have it! I'm still absolutely dumbstruck
that a toy this perfectly done costs only thirty dollars. Unbelievable. In fact, there's really no way
anyone could have done it any better. Buy! Buy! Buy!